Craving the Nomadic Life
In recent months, friends have asked whether I am feeling a pull to get back on the road. Those who've followed me over the past 5 years or so know that there's been a recurring theme- "change of place." It's been an essential part of the journey, both physically and spiritually. Friends have said, "You've been in Portland for a year now, do you have a longing to get moving again?"
There is a strong part of me that is totally in love with Portland, the nature surrounding, the culture, the feeling of finding a "home." I want to grow roots here, I want to stay, yes. At the same time, especially recently, memories of the joy and lightness I feel en route, under stars and below tree branches beacons me.
There's a peace and joy I feel living as a nomad that I've found in no other way, certainly not when compromising my personal expressions to fit into societal norms regarding how one ought to live. From the start of this period of travel and exploration, people have asked, "Are you running away from something?" For many reasons, there are fears around the nomadic life for many people. It's easy to fall into that way of thinking as it's popular. However, in response, I've confidently answered for years now, "No, I am running toward something." This remains true.
What do I run toward? The answer is at least a whole book in length. Maybe one day I'll write it.
We each have the opportunity, at every moment, to create the life we live. I've hunkered down this year in order to start my company, the most important endeavor of my life as it is the very expression of my essence and what I deem worthy of investing the moments of my life in. When I am working directly with clients, I am in "the zone" and living my dream. This commitment to start Wild Spirit Adventure includes lots of administrative work and has required a tremendous amount of focus, energy, perseverance, and a permanent address. Resulting has been a lifestyle often spent indoors, at a computer, when not scouting routes or taking clients on retreat. Over time, I've noticed the price I am paying for this, and the impact on my spirit. Right now, I'm hearing a call to change. My body is asking for it and so is my joy-space.
And what is being asked of me? In fact, I know... the answer is that I need exactly what I offer clients on a retreat. And THIS is exactly why I do the work I do... because I've personally benefited so much from everything I share with people... and I need it as much as my clients. The opportunity to simplify my activities, to get in touch with my body, to let go of and process themes coming up for me, to practice mindfulness, and to listen to my intuition and to nature in order to receive guidance about how to move forward in my life. These are the things I need. Right. Now.
When I get into my camper and drive into nature, I get still and watch the leaves fall, I observe animals, dance, paint, and reflect. I eat simply and feel present in the process of preparing it. I feel connected to the moments in my life. And what I can't entirely describe in words is a feeling of peace and joy that come over me when I am living this way. Smiles come to my face spontaneously, as I watch the sun rise or greet a new place for the first time. Gratitude is my constant companion.
There are many things to say about adventure itself, about the experience of simply going into the unknown. It energizes me- life on the road, wind in my hair, wheels turning their way to newness. This feeling alone is the topic of another blog-post, or twenty.